Top Ten Things I want MORE of in 2014

1. Kale, black strap molasses, grapefruit, clams, coconut oil, and eggs. 

But maybe not all together in

the same dish. These are just a few of the super foods I’m reading about lately. Watch for future blogs that will make you want MORE of them too. For example, Kale has magnesium, calcium, Vitamin D, folate, and fiber – five of the twelve essential elements for a balanced mood, sharp brain, and energized body. Eggs have Vitamin B6 and B12,  folate, iodine, magnesium, iron, Vitamin A, Vitamin D, cholesterol, and omega 3 – all essential elements for a happier self and all found in a free-range chicken egg.

2. Time. 

I have no idea how I can get more of this, but I’m thinking if I run fewer errands, agree to fewer obligations, and clean my house less (if this is possible), I’ll scrape up a few more minutes.

3. Subscribers, Commentors, Followers. 

The blog does fairly well averaging 250-300 unique visits per week, but it could do better. I plan to explore those possibilities to increase my subscribers. Somehow I also need to find a way to conquer Blogspot's security system which rarely allows anyone to comment directly on the blog. I’d also like to get A LOT MORE followers on Facebook. Aside from nagging my friends, I’ll try to figure out other ways to increase my likes. And I’m toying with starting a new blog to support my memoir, Cowboy Mom, which I’m currently shopping to agents. I’m still hot and cold on Twitter and Pinterest, but maybe this year I’ll finally figure out what to do with them.

Top Ten Things I Want Less of in 2014

1. Screens. This won’t be easy. My default mode when bored, waiting for anything (children, food to cook, program to start, appointments) is to open my phone and start fiddling. I used to be religious about checking my e-mail only once daily, but slowly I’ve begun opening it at any opportunity. It’s a distraction and a time-suck, and let’s not even talk about Facebook. I will set parameters for recreational screen time.

2. White sugar and white flour. I’ve just begun reading a fabulous book called The Happiness Diet which 

explains how to eat better for your brain so that you are more focused, have more energy, and feel happier. Sugar is by far the worst thing for your body and soul. Only a few chapters in and I can see that I’ll be changing the way I eat. I’ve allowed small amounts of BAD FOOD to creep into my diet. Change is a comin’…I’m sure you’ll hear more about what this book has to say in future posts. (And if you want to jump onboard – go grab a copy of this fabulous book today!)

3. Mindless eating. I tend to read while I eat and this leads to mindless eating. I become engrossed in the story in front of me and forget that I’m feeding my face at the same time. I need to pay attention to what I am putting in my body. Not just what I eat, but how much. I want to enjoy my food more. I’m certain I can’t give up my morning newspaper with breakfast, but I can stop reading during lunch. It’s a start.

Top Ten Things I Want to Learn in 2014

What do YOU want to learn this year? I’ve been giving this some serious thought. Generally, I just wait for a topic, hobby, adventure to hit me and then I go figure it out. But this year I’m being intentional. Here’s my working list of what I want to learn this year -

1. How to sell a book. I’ve got so many books in me. Three that are already written. What I don’t have is somebody to help me sell them to a publisher. Oh, I know I could self-publish, and it may come to that, but before I do that I want to do everything I can to get a real, live agent. This means learning how to perfect my query, pitch, and angle. This means trying some new tactics and not sitting here waiting to be discovered.

2. How to make soup. I’ve never been a big soup person, but I want to be. I’m not going to force myself to eat soups I already know I don’t like – split pea, squash based soups, clam chowder – I’m going to learn how to make soups I do like. For Christmas I bought myself a fancy new Cuisinart Soup maker with the gift cards I received, so now I can get down to business. Very excited about this project.

3. How to pick a college. The first of my three very bright children is beginning this adventure. I will accompany him to many campuses, peruse catalogs, meet with admissions counselors and find scholarship possibilities. And I will learn the game. I promise to pass along any great wisdom I collect in case you are headed down this road yourself.

4. How to be truly present. I am very good at doing ten things at once. But I don’t want to continue this crazy habit. I’m ready to experience my moments, pay attention to the person in front of me, and listen to my own heart. I haven’t figured out my strategy yet for challenging this lifelong habit, but it is something I want to work on this year.

Top Ten Things I Learned in 2013

We usually have a bonfire on New Year’s Day to burn the things we want to leave in the past. This is mostly symbolic with everyone writing things on paper and tossing them into the fire, but sometimes there are actual items to burn. I used to burn rejection letters from agents and magazines, but these days those lovely missives arrive via e-mail, so it would seem a backward step for the environment if I printed them out and then burned them. It’s much easier to toss them in the virtual trash.

Pinpointing what I’d like to leave behind forces me to evaluate the previous year. This year New Year's Day was cold and we were tired and still digging out from our party the night before. There was a game on and the kids were embracing their last day of unlimited screens. No one mustered up any enthusiasm for the annual tradition. Hopefully we’ll get to it sometime this month as there are several boxes of old bills and insurance papers we unearthed during our basement clean up that await the flame.

But I digress, as usual. This month I’m planning a Top Ten List theme. I like to take time at New Year’s to think about what went well and what didn’t during the past year. Creating these Top Ten lists will help me sort through the past year and make resolutions for the new one. My four themes are:

Top Ten Things I learned this past year.

Top Ten Things I’d like to learn in the new year.

Top Ten Things I’ll avoid in the coming year.

Top Ten Things I’ll indulge more in this year.

I’d welcome your lists if you’re inspired to create your own. I’d also welcome ideas for other Top Ten Lists.

So without further ado…..

I Hate Diets!

My favorite jeans are feeling a little snug this week. I think, no, I know, the holidays were too much fun. I reveled in the homemade truffles, infused oils, my weakness for good wine, cooking with my hubby, and so many meals out, I think I overdid it. How about you? Are you as grateful as I am for the big sweaters of January?


I hate diets. They make me grumpy and resentful. Besides, I like food too much. So I’ve got a plan. It’s my own diet created in the wee hours of the morning as I ran on freezing cold, dark roads this past week. A few miles in and my mind really gets cranking. I become pretty much invincible. That’s when this plan was hatched. So you’ll need to keep your perspective as you read this. But mostly you have to open your mind to the distinct possibility that it can be done.

I’m calling it the 2-ingredient diet. The original diet was 1 ingredient, but then the sun came up and it dawned on me (so to speak) that cheese and butter have two ingredients, and while I know I could make both cheese and butter, I don’t want to. And then there’s wine – grape juice and yeast. Some things we can’t do without.

So he are the 2 rules for 2 Ingredient Diet:

1. Eat only things that have 2 ingredients or less. Orange – fine. Pop Tart – nope. Cheese – good (as long as it isn’t processed) Macaroni & Cheese – nope (unless you make it yourself – including the pasta!).

2. No processed food unless you process it yourself. Ahh! Here’s the brilliance of this plan! You can eat ice cream, bread, cookies, and anything else you can make yourself using ingredients with no more than 2 ingredients. I’m already pouring over recipes for crackers and I ordered a tortilla maker so I can make tortillas, chips, and burrito shells.

Simple, huh? I figure even if I can’t stick to it exclusively, it will slow me down, make me think about what I’m eating and more importantly, what goes in to what I’m eating.

After my second child, I had some serious weight to lose, so I signed up for Weight Watchers. Great program and it worked for me because it was flexible. You could save up points (I stock piled mine for the Orioles games each weekend). This made nothing off limits. I want the 2 Ingredient Diet to have an element of this. Plus, I know there are certain foods I can’t make myself, and I just might not be able to function without them. So I created the exclusion clause. Gone are my idealistic days of youth, nowadays I’m all about reality. And no one will join me on this diet if I don’t provide a little slack.

You can exclude 2 foods from the rules. Now, if you really want this to work I wouldn’t recommend you exclude Reese’s Cups and cheesecake, but there are probably foods that could be diet-busters for you. One of my exceptions is going to be Trader Joes Tomato and Red Pepper soup. I love this soup and this time of year, it’s unreasonable and unaffordable for me to make it. That will be next summer’s project, but for now it’s one of my exceptions.

I haven’t decided on the other exception yet. I’m thinking maybe pasta, but then I remember that my mom gave me her old pasta maker last year and I have yet to try it out. I’m only one day in to this diet, so I’m saving my other exception for emergencies.

The other problem with the 2 Ingredient Diet is eating out. How can you eat out? Very few options. Could be tough, so I’m allowing one meal eaten out each week.

The diet started off great yesterday until I fixed a salad for lunch and opened the fridge for a dressing. I counted not one, but five store-bought dressings that only I will eat. (the kids stick to that gnarly Hidden Valley Farms Ranch Dressing and NOTHING else) Now my Scot-Irish heritage (or my depression era raised mother) have instilled in me that you don’t throw out useful things. So…here’s another clause in my 2 Ingredient Diet. (I’m all about flexibility). If it’s already opened and/or it will expire soon, you can finish it off. So once those dressings are gone, I will stick with the ones I make (which I usually like better anyway). Same with the trail mix and black licorice. No one else will touch those.

Yeah, I know my diet isn’t very strict. And yeah, I know I won’t lose ten pounds this month. But my goal is to feel better, eat better, and fit better in to my jeans. I’m not going to judge my success by the scale. That’s a dangerous way to live.

In case you’re curious how the 2 Ingredient Diet works out, I’m going to add a box to my blogsite with regular updates, including recipes for processed food you’d be surprised you can make yourself. Santa brought me a book filled with recipes for things like pop-tarts and ritz crackers. That could be a fun challenge – can there be a way to make pop-tarts “healthy”? I’ll share my successes and failures and observations periodically on the side bar of my blog.

So, are any of you game for the 2 Ingredient Diet?? I’d love to hear from you and you don’t have to “go public,” you can e-mail me directly if you want. Tell me what you think, what works, and even if it all sounds crazy. Maybe it is. But I’m sure we’ll learn something about who we are and the food we eat. And hopefully, we’ll find ourselves feeling better and looking better by spring!

Garfield, Augustus, Obituaries, & New Year's Resolutions

As my 7 year old sat down to breakfast, he asked in all seriousness, “Who would win - Garfield or Augustus?” He’d obviously been in the middle of this scenario when I’d called him to breakfast and he paused over his plate for my answer.

Playing my well-worn role of the clueless parent, I asked, “Who’s Augustus?” I knew that Garfield was obviously the fat orange cat found in the funny pages (my children love the Garfield movies which I find obnoxious because they always lead to farting and burping jokes), but I hadn’t a clue who Augustus might be or what he might be trying to win.

My child sighed at my incredible slowness, and said, “You know, Augustus.” Cue – the imploring you’re-not-really-that-stupid-mom-are-you?- look. When I registered no recognition, he shook his head in disgust and said, “From Willy Wonka?” He took a bite of French Toast and watched me, waiting for my answer.

I scanned my brain for some recall of any kind of recent battle between Garfield and Augustus and came up empty. “What are Garfield and August trying to win?” I asked.

Again, the sigh and now a roll of the eyes thrown in to hammer home his point about my ineptness. “An eating contest!” Duh, like I should have known this!

As I stalled for time to make my decision, I asked for more information. “Why are they having an eating contest?” My child hasn’t discovered the hot dog eating contests on TV yet, but the last time my husband’s best childhood pal was here, he and my son had a pizza eating contest (which my seven year old won I’m not proud to say), so I know this is a sport he is destined to aspire to, no matter how much I hammer home the idea of eating only what you need.

My son shakes his head at my silly question and takes another bite of his French toast. “Who would win?” he asks again between bitefuls. “I picked them because they’re the biggest eaters I know.”

“I’d have to go with Garfield,” I decide, picturing my own fat cat the time he got the lid off the catfood cannister. My son nods his head at my wise choice.

I think one of the primary functions of children is to remind us that we should never let reality get in the way of our thought processes, especially our dreams. Reality can really hamper possibilities. This conversation was a good reminder for me as I contemplate my New Year’s Resolution. I’m all about New Year’s Resolutions. How about you? Have you made any? Using your imagination to dream up an amazing life is a wonderful thing to do. And each resolution should move you another step towards that amazing life. I usually do my dreaming and scheming during a run, but since my runs have been limited to the tread mill by the godforsaken snow and ice for two weeks, I’ve been pondering my resolutions on paper. So far I haven’t gotten to anything very imaginative or even worthy of a Garfield vs. Augustus challenge.

I think the place to start is to dream up the person I want to be and the life I want to lead with no considerations for reality. I once did an exercise for a class in college in which we had to write our obituary. We had to write what we would be remembered for and how we would be described. When we finished the essay, the professor told us that we had just written our life’s mission statement. Mine was pretty lofty at the time, but I’ve held on to it and edited it as my values and my world view have shifted. Every morning now when I read the newspaper, I always scan the obituaries. I’m not looking for anyone I know (although from time to time a familiar face does appear). I’m just curious. I look at the faces and I read some of the write-ups and I think about who those people were. I wonder why that particular picture was chosen. I wonder what kind of life they had. I wonder if they were happy. I look for a good mission statement. As I read the mission statements revealed in the obituaries, I think I’m unconsciously comparing it to what my own obituary will say. I would like to be better at living out my own mission statement.

New Year’s resolutions call us back to our mission. They can help us stay on the track we want to follow. I have a copy of my own mission statement I wrote twenty years ago that I keep in my wallet. I rarely look at it and am always surprised when I come across it as I’m searching for whatever store bonus card the cashier happens to be demanding. But today I will pull up my mission statement on my computer and I’ll look it over. I’ll decide if it’s still my mission and whether I’m making any progress towards fulfilling it. I’ll imagine my life the way I want it to be and then I’ll sit down and write out some New Year’s resolutions to help me get there.

And New Year’s resolutions aren’t just for adults. It’s a great idea to have your kids come up with their own resolutions. Teach them now that we are all under construction. We can all be healthier, happier, life contributors. My family has a memory book that we started at the new millennium. Each New Year’s Eve we all answer five questions in the book. Those questions are:

1) What do I want to be when I grow up? (it’s funny how my husband’s and my answers keep changing too – shows how growing up is truly relative)

2) What’s the best thing that happened this year? (the answers from the kids when they were toddlers and preschoolers are pretty good – they say a lot about what’s memorable for children)

3) What’s important to you? (This is my favorite question. I love seeing how my kids’ values are developing. They always make me catch my breath)

4) What have you learned this year? (This one causes all of us to be grateful and takes the most thought.)

5) What do you think will happen in 2010? (Sometimes this gets pretty wild as in “Chickens will rule the world!” from my preteen and sometimes it’s very simple as in “Santa Claus will come.” from my then two year old.)

It’s a brand new year – the perfect time to take stock. What’s important to you? What do you want to be when you grow up? And most importantly, What have you learned? Ask yourself and ask your family. If you’re so inclined, find a few minutes and write your new year’s resolutions or better yet your obituary. If nothing else, it will give you a chance to hit the pause button on your crazy life and consider what your mission is.